Dreams do manifest ;)!
***New***Hands down, Experience is the Best Teacher!!
Experience by definition is “practical contact with and observation of facts or events”. Experience has always been deemed the best teacher. For it is through our senses we determine firsthand whether or not we enjoy an experience, and decide if we want to partake in it. Making the decision to be a part of an experience often teaches and molds us better than a parent or teacher. A person of authority can preach a message but how can you truly learn if you don’t apply the lesson. Being up close and personal with an event and our observation of it has the ability to burn or delight us, and this is how we come to learn our limits and what we’re willing to indulge in.
Top experiences we encounter in life: education, relationship, job, childbirth, spiritual, death, pain, and the list goes on.
Why is experience the best teacher? Through experience we gain wisdom. This wisdom cannot be attained without experience. The more experiences we have, the more wisdom we have in choosing what’s best for us.
Do experiences really make us wiser? Through trial and error we began to learn about ourselves (strengths, weaknesses, character) this can help us to become greater individuals. “Play with fire you get burned”, it is through our experience of the fire we learn we don’t like it.
What should I do after an experience? Reflect upon the experience. Was it pleasant or uneasy? Acknowledge the experience (Trust me on this). Feel all of the emotions related to the experience and choose to continue the experience or not.
Personal Testimony: I, like many of you have encountered many experiences that have caused pain and delight. One experience I’d like to share is, I chose to park in a private lot without paying the meter. In the past I had skipped out on paying meters; and this particular instance I wand up paying for all the combined tolls I had ever skipped out on paying during my 3.5 years living in Miami. This was one of those unpleasant experiences that changed my perspective on parking without feeding the meter. As a result I am more respectful of parking enforcement rules and regulations, and paying meters. An amazing quote by Erykah Badu states “the sooner we learn from our mistakes the better we will be”. I like to think I learn the most through experience. Experiences can be trail and error, but we must learn from them and grow!
When going though an Experience keep in mind the following:
- Choose your decisions wisely as experiences are sure to follow.
- Pray and spend moments in solitude so that you are guided properly.
- Lean on your friends and elders (for wisdom) to offer support and advice during difficult experiences.
- If you don’t like an experience make the necessary changes you can to end them.
- Share how your experiences impacted you with others; because you may never know how they will heal from your testimony.
Much Gratitude,
RJ
And to not EVOLVE is dangerous.
“We must FORGE on”
While reading an article about International Women’s Day (IWC) the author decided to link it to Mother’s Day and Valentines. As if to say it’s another holiday reserved for celebrating and cherishing women for their essence. I personally don’t think IWF has the same semblance. In fact, I think it’s one of the most social impacting movements of our time.
I believe IWF is a day for the world to reflect on political and social activism that have afforded women equal pay, voting rights, property rights, rights over their bodies, and the list goes on. Not only do I believe it’s a day to reflect on these victories but most importantly it’s to compare and measure how stagnant we remain or how much we still need to achieve. For instance, we still earn less than men (16% to be exact), we are still more likely to experience domestic violence and sexual assault, 80 percent of congress is male (meaning we are underrepresented in government) and the harshest realization is although American women are making strides in 2017, our sisters in the East are still subjected to unfair conditions, like ones occurring during the 1900’s.
In my heart and mind, I believe we as a nation and people should highlight this day and the accomplishments of courageous women and men who made it impactful. However, to frame it as just another day to “cherish” women is dimming it down. Yes, we women have come so far but still have much more to accomplish. We must continue to break down barriers for more advantages and equalities. We must continue to lift our voice and secure our divine rights. When thinking of the unjust and unfair systems we need to disassemble-and how to achieve it-my mom, Aung San Suu Kyi, Angela Davis, Oprah Winfrey and many others come to mind. May we channel courageous women that have paved the way, summon the women who are ready to make a difference and protect the women that need our shelter.
Much Gratitude,
RJ
****NEW****Don’t read these QUOTES….too inspiring
One of my favorite pass times is to read quotes. When I need inspiration, a new perspective, liberation, and optimism; quotes never fail me. Below listed a collection of quotes from my favorite authors, speakers, and influences. They are listed in the categories of love, fear, success, political, spirituality, and equality. May they inspire and provoke change in you as they have in me.
LOVE
“LEARNING LOVE If our parents didn’t love and understand each other, how are we to know what love looks like? There aren’t courses or classes in love. If the grown-ups know how to take care of each other, then the children who grow up in this environment will naturally know how to love, understand, and bring happiness to others. The most precious inheritance that parents can give their children is their own happiness. Our parents may be able to leave us money, houses, and land, but they may not be happy people. If we have happy parents, we have received the richest inheritance of all.”
― Thich Nhat Hanh
“To love is to recognize yourself in another.”
― Eckhart Tolle
SUCCESS
“Success means we go to sleep at night knowing that our talents and abilities were used in a way that served others.”
― Marianne Williamson
“Cherish your visions. Cherish your ideals. Cherish the music that stirs in your heart, the beauty that forms in your mind, the loveliness that drapes your purest thoughts. For out of them will grow all delightful conditions, all heavenly environment, of these, if you but remain true to them, your world will at last be built.”
― James Allen
EQUALITY
“To call woman the weaker sex is a libel; it is man’s injustice to woman. If by strength is meant brute strength, then, indeed, is woman less brute than man. If by strength is meant moral power, then woman is immeasurably man’s superior. Has she not greater intuition, is she not more self-sacrificing, has she not greater powers of endurance, has she not greater courage? Without her, man could not be. If nonviolence is the law of our being, the future is with woman. Who can make a more effective appeal to the heart than woman?“
― Mahatma Gandhi
“Equality is not a concept. It’s not something we should be striving for. It’s a necessity. Equality is like gravity. We need it to stand on this earth as men and women, and the misogyny that is in every culture is not a true part of the human condition. It is life out of balance, and that imbalance is sucking something out of the soul of every man and woman who’s confronted with it. We need equality. Kinda now.”
― Joss Whedon
FEAR
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
― Marianne Williamson
“There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.”
― John Lennon
POLITICAL
“There comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but he must take it because conscience tells him it is right.”
― Martin Luther King Jr.
“I am no longer accepting the things I cannot change. I am changing the things I cannot accept.”
― Angela Y. Davis
SPIRITUALITY
“Usually, fundamentalists, be they Christian, Muslim, or any faith, shape and interpret religious thought to make it conform to and legitimize a conservative status quo. Fundamentalist thinkers use religion to justify supporting imperialism, militarism, sexism, racism, homophobia. They deny the unifying message of love that is at the heart of every major religious tradition.”
― bell hooks
“Because you’re a creation of God, you reflect the Divine qualities of creativity, wisdom, and love.”
― Doreen Virtue
RJ
***NEW***Our Environments can Make or Break us!
“I can’t remain in an environment that is not conducive to my growth”. These words rolled effortlessly off the tongue of one of my colleagues. She was fed up with working and receiving minimal recognition and support with professional development, needed to excel. She was keen on growing and advancing in the work-sense but was not given the opportunities. She held a volunteer role but was adamant about transitioning to employee to manager to director and finally CEO. Many of you may think, these are just titles; however they are an individual’s desires, whereby if placed in the proper environment, combined with self-effort is achievable.
When I listened to my coworker discuss finding a job, one she wo uld feel was a rocket ship to her success I thought about the environments we grow up in. I remember asking myself the question “Did I grow up in a limiting environment”? My response was “somewhat, and it could have been better”. When I think of an environment I think of the people I grew up around, family, friends and community, resources like education, access to proper healthcare and food and shelter. In regards to a limiting environment, one where the family is broken, education is poor, the community is lacking in social niceties, health care is below average, and the water is polluted, statistically speaking this is a challenging environment to thrive in.
My friend knew she wanted more out of life, and specifically work. She knew that a part of getting to her destination relied on her environment. What I have come to realize is everything is ephemeral, including our environments. This is very important to note because people often believe in the reality that appears, instead of the “will” to change their destiny. I believe in God, and in all sacred books you will find the truest words “where there’s a will there’s a way.” Regardless of what you’ve experienced in the past or present in your environment, if you want to have different results, you can, you will. I’ve witnessed people from the most destitute environments rise to exponential degrees of success (mentally, spiritually, physically, and financially). I have also witnessed individuals from the same environment remain bound. Whether the goal is to travel the world advocating against social injustices (my dream), be an awesome mother or the next Dalai Lama, placing yourself in the environment most conducive to your growth is crucial, and key to your success.
Environments that will propel your growth.
Beautiful-Whether spending time on a beach, garden, or Mount Everest, allowing yourself to be in beautiful environments will bring forth the best inspiration that will never cease to motivate you to be creative and excited to contribute more in life.
Spiritual-Experience God’s love through allowing the energy to flow through you and sharing it with others. Take time to be in solitude in prayer and meditation. This is how you remain joyful, radiant, full and tenacious.
Positive-Maintain a circle of family, friends and associates that uplift you, and inspire you to keep pushing outside of your comfort zone. The quote “show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are”, shouldn’t be taken for granted.
Intellectual-Visit libraries, learning institutions, museums, workshops etc. keep advancing and surround yourself with individuals smarter than you, absorb the knowledge and thrive.
Much Gratitude,
RJ
Currently, In life like, I’m PREPARED, BRING IT ON💫
***New***The Biggest Mistake I Made in 2016
The biggest mistake I made in 2016 was not being aware of what I wanted. I started the year off sure of myself and what I wanted to achieve, yet as the days and months passed I wasn’t satisfied. I was receiving the things I yearned for but not feeling fulfilled. I tried to count my blessings and compare myself to others that appeared more ± less fortunate than me, to gain a different viewpoint and ended up feeling inspired or less satisfied.
Sometimes you think you know exactly what you want, a mansion, child, to cheat (which is so lame) etc. but at the core of this all we’re really aiming for is happiness. When we receive our wants the euphoric feelings that arise are ephemeral. Studies have shown that humans are addicted to novelty (new experiences) and in these moments our brain releases a ‘feel good’ hormone called serotonin. So, it feels good to get what you want!
I thought I wanted a cool/relaxed career, a phenomenal life partner to travel the world with, 1 million followers on my YouTube channel, and to eat whatever I wanted without having to hit the gym-and these things would make me happy. While I’d love to have these things, I think I was equating all of this to “successes”, and vital to my happiness. I remember this quote from one of my favorite people in the world Thich Nant Hanh “Each one of us has to ask ourselves, What do I really want? Do I really want to be Number One? Or do I want to be happy? If you want success, you may sacrifice your happiness for it. You can become a victim of success, but you can never become a victim of happiness.”
After allowing these fine words to marinate, I realized the biggest mistake I made in 2016 was believing that success equaled happiness. I was so caught up in reaching goals this year instead of taking the time out to enjoy the journey; and to be happy in each moment- with-or-without-success. It was the feelings of happiness I wanted all along. Furthermore, I needed to comprehend that happiness comes from within and not to look outside for it.
Recommendations:
Affirmations to repeat over and over for a more centered life, where, regardless of the factors your happiness doesn’t waiver.
- Everyday in every way I am getting happier and happier
- Because I seek the lord I do not lack for any good thing
- To offer no resistance to life is to be in a state of grace ease and lightness
- Every day in every way I am in divine alignment
What was you’re biggest mistake in 2016? Please share below.
For videos click here to check out my YouTube channel
Much Gratitude,
RJ
***NEW***Life Ends Fast, Spend it Feeling Good!!
Before we end the year, I thought I’d like to share how important it is to spend your time wisely. I know the saying is cliché but it’s one of the wisest sayings I have yet to hear. Not too long ago I was in a stressful situation that didn’t feel good and was looking for the light at the end of the tunnel. Last week a series of events stressed me out during the first half of my day; and all I could think of was going home, crawling beneath my bed, and never coming out. After a period of overwhelming negative thinking, I did not want to feel that way any longer. I preferred to feel good and wanted to use my time here on earth wisely.
Often, we get caught up in the drama and squander our valuable time. When was the last time you experienced a situation, you didn’t like and it destroyed your mood? You may have saw someone being mistreated (or yourself), you may have argued with your SO (significant other), you might have gotten laid off, or perhaps the Sun failed to shine the way you wanted it. Whatever the event may be, it’s easy to go down a negative spiral and remain there for hours, days, weeks, even worse years.
The more experiences I have and mature I become I realize the ebbs and flows in life are constant. And in this I’ve learned I want to be a person who is joyful and feeling good. In the event, I’m allowing a negative situation to shape my day I am not using my time on earth wisely, and not being the person I desire to be. I met with a kind gentleman this afternoon, his name is Mr. West (83 yo) and we discussed life, politics, God, marriage etc. He mentioned that “life will be tough sometimes but if you can be happy, laugh, and be sure to enjoy it you can make the most out of it”. I found our meeting and conversation ironic because I’ve stressed to my friends how much I just want to be strategic about my time; and my meeting with Mr. West was confirmation for me that I’m on the right track. Without the contrast of not feeling good or joyful I wouldn’t be inclined to put forth effort to live, laugh and love. I’m grateful for the contrast and life which I prefer to live happily.
Last tidbit, look up the studies behind living healthy and being happy as opposed to being sad, I will encourage you to prioritize.
Much gratitude,
R
Working on yourself is the best job you can ever have. The benefits are inner peace, self-love, joy, patience, confidence, stronger connection with God, stronger sense of self, and the list goes on and on! 💫
#fuelforthought